by James Davis

1.
By dunking a boy
in a bay
of breast milk, one may
produce a man.

2.
Protect the boy ­­­­­­
from the feather boa.
Should he baa
as you shear his fleece, ban
clover and kudzu till he can
behave like a man.

3.
The problem of the boy
and the soy
milk is to be taken seriously.
Here's what the experts say:
"Look at it this way:
do you want a wan,
lactating ghost, or a man?"

4.
Nothing should come between a boy
and his bog.
I mean, his log.
A good log, one that won't lag
behind, that will lie on the boy's lap
and unfold like the map
to becoming a man.

5.
"Boy,"
you say, "bow
lower—a cow
could low lower—a crow could caw
sweeter—the law
permits only low
bowing—I'll mow
you lower—read my maw—
be a man."

James Davis is an MFA candidate at the University of Florida. His work has appeared in NANOfiction and the Goodreads.com monthly newsletter, and is forthcoming in New York Quarterly. He does not appreciate being told he resembles the following: John Heder, Al Yankovic, Fred Schneider.